Age of Ultron

Age of Ultron left me waiting for it to end, which is hard for a superhero story to do.

I was going to put up a long post about all the things wrong with it, but they're all some variation of this: the movie does too good a job capturing the comics it's based on. Those comics sprawl endlessly over month after month, hinting at but never delivering a satisfying resolution (big fights don't count), and are honeycombed with events dropped in to promote other comics, or the crossover du jour, or make fun of Bush (yeah, still).

And now, Marvel movies do too.

But that's not what I want to say today. No, I'm thinking about an interview Joss Whedon gave in which he said Marvel wouldn't let him do something with the Hulk, at the end, which would have been "the single greatest fist-pumping moment in the Marvel Cinematic Universe,"iirc.

He wouldn't say what it was; he said he liked it so much he begged Marvel not to throw it away, because they could use it in another movie.

So what could it be?

Whedon understands structure. So when he puts in two different unsuccessful attempts to control the Hulk, it's possible that was meant to set up an epic payoff, which then got deleted.

First, we see the Black Widow's way of handling the Hulk: soft talk and a drug injection. Basically, lying. Then Iron Man has his way of dealing with a Hulk problem: hit him really, really hard. That doesn't work out so well either.

What we don't see is Banner handling the Hulk. Wouldn't it have been cool if, when Black Widow says she loves him, but she needs the other guy, he'd said something like, "There is no other guy. I am the Hulk." And turned all Hulked-out, but gray, and said, "What do you need me to do?" in Hulk's voice.

Tricking him didn't work and beating on him didn't work, but Banner yielding halfway to the Hulk to create a new personality would have worked, and been way cool.

Maybe that's not what Whedon had in mind. Maybe it was even better!

But who knows, because the writer doesn't get to decide the ending of an Avengers movie any more. That's up to the suits in the boardroom

Just like the comics.

Update

I have the following projects in the works:

INVADERS FROM EARTH. So the Martians invade and fail. Is there any way we can get back up there and clobber them? Space warfare circa 1890. The Martians' motives are not what they seem. They kill us, drink out blood, and burn our cities, sure, but that's not the point. They're after something else altogether, and although we've jacked some of their tech, it's not something we can really solve by burning them with heat-rays. Although they do have their uses.

OUT OF TIME. Sequel to Up in Smoke. The new superheroes of St. Albert's City are attacked by solar-powered menaces from the future. Lots of them! Not only is Solarman not dead, he's got about a dozen other Solarmen cooperating to take out Earth's only defenders, the Honor Patrol! The future looks grim -- after all, that's where the invaders are coming from!

OPERATION ZOMBIE. Sequel to Operation Renfield. On the Russian front, you have to kill a guy again and again to get him to stay down. Our guys, they mostly get one death. The exception is Elvish-American Sgt. Mithrandir Murphy, and his recon outfit's got to find a way to even death's mathematics before the zombies take it all.

OPERATION NEMO. The Sea People control the deep Pacific. But we control the surface. Can you really make them lie down and give up when you can sail over their countries but can't ever land on them? Sure you can. Submarines are easy -- iron sinks. It's coming back up afterwards that's the tricky part ...

OPERATION UNDERLORD. D-Day in Hell. The forces of freedom vs. the Pit of the Damned. Hey, if we want the Devil to stop messing with us, we have to kick in his door and whack him, right? Easy to say ... if you can trust everyone on your own side!

All of these have at least 2000 words written already, which is like 8 typed pages, so they're barely started. I've got ideas ... piles of ideas. Now that the chemistry book's done, I may be able to get going on some of these!

New Book

Yes, I just finished a new book. It's a chemistry textbook for Chemistry 1, but hey, it's full of action!

And acids. Lots of acids.